Missing Jewelry and Magazines/Humming and Pringles (soft food diet)

I've decided to combine topics #3 and #4 because they are relatively small topics and they all happened at the Palm Springs condo.

If you know anything about F-ing c, you know that she steals things. If something happens to be sitting around without an owner in sight, it is now her property. Such is the case with the missing bracelet and magazines. The bracelet was one of my favorites. I generally don't wear bracelets because they're kind of annoying, but this one was pretty awesome. The magazine was Women's Health, and I had never even gotten a chance to read it. There were only 4 people at the condo: Dad, F-ing c, myself, and Marc. Now tell me, who do you think took my WOMEN's Health magazine? Marc? Dad? Probably not. Who do you think took off with my totally girly bracelet? Marc? Dad? Probably not. I've got one word for you: BITCH!

Moving on...

F-ing c always has a million stupid magazines that she reads (so why she has to steal mine is beyond me, but whatever). Woman's Week, Woman's World, US weekly, and so on. Well one week she read an article that said "people that hum have a happy heart". I could KILL whoever wrote that article because for the next few days she WOULDN'T STOP HUMMING! One of these particular days I was on the computer trying to do homework, when she came in, sat down, and started humming. I waited patiently for the humming to cease but she wasn't letting up, so I turned and asked her very nicely to stop humming. She very seriously looked at me and said "no", and went back to humming. WTF?! F-ing c does not have a "happy heart", she's got a bitch heart!

And last but not least the Pringles story! So Donkey Face had an operation on her esophagus and had strict orders not to eat any solid foods. She made a HUGE deal about not being able to eat certain things and was a major pain in the ass because of it. Anyway, I had bought two packs of Pringles chips before they came to "visit" one weekend. One of them was BBQ, the other was Sour Cream and Onion. I had eaten a few of the BBQ chips, but hadn't yet opened the Sour Cream and Onion chips. The weekend came and went and so did dad and f-ing c. Imagine my surprise when I went to open the Sour Cream and Onion chips and found that three quarters of them had been eaten!! And my dad doesn't like Sour Cream and Onion chips so who do you think ate them?! ha! I'm pretty sure that chips qualify as solid food, but what the heck do I know ;)